The Real Me

Every morning, I have a tradition of opening up the book of Psalms and reading a chapter. I love this book because it’s a book of prayers and songs to God. It’s filled with emotion and raw descriptions of the challenges people face. This morning, I opened the book to Psalms 32 and as I read it, I began to get a little emotional.

The writer, David, begins to describe how blessed it is for a man to confess his sins before God. In one part, David describes his turmoil of keeping his sin a secret. He writes, “When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long.” As I read that, I remembered all the times I’ve kept secrets and all the times I put on different faces and tried to keep up certain pseudos to co-workers, family members and friends.

I thought of all the times I was filled with anxiety because of the lies I was juggling, about the times I couldn’t look my friend in the face because I wasn’t living how I knew I should, and all the times I felt insecure because no one knew the real me. Just like David I know the agony of not being an open book. I know how it feels to pretend, be a liar, and to hate myself.

It’s heavy to keep up pseudos and I was emotional this morning because I was thankful- thankful that I don’t live like that anymore. Just like David, I realized that to be fully awake and to be fully loved, I must open up and show people the real me, warts and all.

Jesus thought this was important, too. In Luke chapter 18, Jesus tells a story about two men. One is a tax collector and the other is a religious leader. Jesus says both of these men approached the temple to pray. The religious leader went first and said, “God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector.” Even if that wasn’t a lie, how arrogant.

Here is this “holy man”, filled with religious pride, thanking God for something that was not true. This man was blinded by the appearances he was trying to keep up. And this isn’t just speculation. Jesus often rebuked the religious leaders in His day and for doing the very thing this guy prayed he didn’t do.

This religious leader was not open before God. He was not truthful about who he was and the sins he committed. Isn’t that what happens to us? We keep up appearances so much that we actually don’t know how to have a healthy relationship? We can’t even have a conversation without lying or exaggerating the truth. We don’t know how to put our walls down, even before God?

Next up was the tax collector. These guys were known for swindling and lying to people to get what they wanted. They were known for ripping people off and getting away with it. But this man’s prayer was much different than the religious man. Jesus goes on to say this about the tax collector, “But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his chest and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’

Jesus finishes His teaching by saying, “which man do you think was accepted by God?”

He was teaching people about being open before God. Jesus continues to teach that God does not look at the outside of man, but at the heart of man. If a man would humble himself before God and confess, God would accept him.

Isn’t this true with people, too? Aren’t people more inclined to accept someone who is open and truthful rather than someone who is fake? Without this quality, it’s impossible to experience true love.

Doesn’t true love see the good, the bad and the ugly and still say, ‘I accept you’? I’m glad I have relationships like this. That I’m not hiding who I am, but I’m loved, quirks and all. I’m fully me and I’m glad I’m fully known.

I often ask myself why I used to live life like this. Why did I pretend that I had money when I didn’t? Why didn’t I tell the truth when I was hurting? Why did I lie about my shirt size? Or about how much I weighed? So many things I’ve lied about or hidden from people that was unnecessary.

I realized that this tactic wasn’t protecting me the way I thought it would. I was fooled by my insecurities that if I opened up and shared with people how I truly felt, what I truly thought, or how I truly lived, no one would love me. But all it did was bury my sense of worth.

In the book of James, it says, confess to your brothers so that you may be healed. Today, stop hiding behind the fear of what people think. Stop hiding behind the idea that God doesn't want anything to do with you. Let people see who you really are.

Chad Fagundes
Outreach and Men’s Pastor

What I Owe You

It’s not what you owe me, it’s what I owe you.

 

This phrase popped into my mind while processing a betrayal with a friend. The betrayal was real and, by all accounts, the friend had every right to take their pound of flesh in exchange for the wound received.

 

Of course, living the Jesus way means this kind of vengeance is unacceptable. We know that. But living it out is another thing entirely. 

 

Something about the way this particular phrase came to me, struck a chord. 

 

It's not what you owe me,

but what I owe you.

 

As humans we love to think in terms of who owes what. It helps us know our place. Are we the lender or the debtor? We love to keep accounts in our relationships, carefully measuring whether we have given more or received more and whether it has been too long since "they" have made a deposit! 

 

Personally, I don't like to be in another's debt. — I scramble to get out of it. I'll beg forgiveness. I'll pay extra to make it right. I'll go out of my way until I feel that the deficit has been sufficiently back-filled.  

 

The problem is that it is a totally wrong way to live.

 

Because it’s not about what you owe me, but what I owe you.

 

The Apostle Paul said it well, “Let no debt remain outstanding except the continuing debt to love one another.”

 

There is one bill that can never be marked zero. One bill that can never be sufficiently back-filled no matter how much remorse, regret, or relief I give. Measuring how much I have given is meaningless! 

 

The reason we have an open debt is because of what Jesus did for us. On the Cross, He covered our debt with God the Father. He made a way where there was no way. He opened the door that no man can shut. He invited us into heaven to spend eternity with Him. 

 

And He did that before we even knew Him. We certainly didn’t deserve it! If His gift was based on our deserving it, we wouldn’t have a chance. This kind of love is almost impossible for us humans to understand. It is a love that gives the best even when others do their worst.

And that is why we have to ask Jesus to help us to love others in this way. It is only through His power that we can do it! 

 

Who do you owe forgiveness?

Who do you owe patience?

Who do you owe a second (or a 100th chance)?

Who do you owe a listening ear or a kind response?

 

I owe, I owe, so it’s off to work I go! 

 

Andrew Cromwell

Lead Pastor

It’s The Little Things...

Often, the smallest things grow into something HUGE! Whether it’s a habit, a routine, a legacy, a tradition – they all begin with one small step.

 

You probably have Christmas traditions that you have created and practiced over the years. They may have even started with your parents or grandparents or several generations of your family.

 

In our family, we have some familiar ones:

·      We go to Christmas Eve candlelight service together.

·      We open one gift on Christmas Eve.

·      We bake a ‘Happy Birthday, Jesus’ cake.

·      We try to stay in our pajamas all day long and do as little as possible and just be with one another.

 

None of these traditions are handed down. We created these ourselves – little by little, over time. We started by doing them once, enjoying the experience, and repeating it again year after year. I am certain many of these will stay with my kids as they raise their own kids.

 

The same is true of our relationship with God. You may have some pretty solid habits in place when it comes to worshiping and serving Him. Or you may not even know where to begin.

 

Someone recently shared this quote with me about God and becoming aware of His presence:

 

“He does not ask much of us, merely a thought of Him from time to time, a little act of adoration, sometimes to ask for His grace, sometimes to offer Him your sufferings, at other times to thank Him for the graces, past and present, He has bestowed on you, in the midst of your troubles to take solace in Him as often as you can. Lift up your heart to Him during your meals and in company; the least little remembrance will always be the most pleasing to Him. One need not cry out very loudly; He is nearer to us than we think.”


 

It is from a book of teachings entitled, “The Practice and Presence of God”. These are teachings from Brother Lawrence, born Nicolas Herman, a 17^th-century friar. The basic theme of the book is the development of an awareness of the presence of God.

 

This struck me as a very pleasant sentiment about our interactions with God. Whether we don’t know Him at all, find ourselves too busy, or have a great habit of spending time in His presence, it is nice to hear that He is always near and any little thing we give is pleasing to Him.

 

This is an encouragement to begin a new tradition with your friends or family or even just for yourself. Begin a holiday tradition that includes God. It can be any little thing. A prayer before a meal, a quick ‘thank you, Jesus’ before opening gifts, a reading of Jesus’ birth in Luke 2:1-20 or may even bundling up and joining Koinonia Church outside, under the stars, for a quick candlelight service.

 

Do these things as a way to connect and celebrate the birth of the Savior.

Perhaps it will become the small thing that becomes a big tradition that you want to continue for years to come.

 

It’s the little things. These sayings exist because they are SO TRUE! It IS the little things! It is the small things that add up to become something incredibly wonderful.

 

I pray your Christmas is full of love and peace. I pray that you draw closer to the one who created you. I pray that you begin, or continue, doing a little thing that adds up to a big wonderful thing.

 

“You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy…” -Psalm 16:11

 

Merry Christmas.

 

Sylvia Gaston
Connection and Development Pastor  

Buggin’ Out

In 2012, the show, “Doomsday Preppers”, debuted and introduced the American mainstream to the prepping lifestyle. You’ll find preppers all over America and I’d bet there is probably at least one in your own neighborhood right now. Preppers are people who are actively preparing for the worst. If the power grid goes out, they’re ready with portable solar panels. If the city water plant fails, they’ve got water in their garage and kits to filter out even that nastiest bacteria. If anarchy breaks out, they’ve got a backpack that is ready to go at any moment so they can bug out and head for the hills.

2020 has been such a strange year that it has made us all feel insecure about the future. Maybe things aren’t going to melt down completely, but I have to be honest there have been days when I’ve wondered if I should have my own bug out bag packed and ready to go!

What I am 100% certain of is that all of us need to think about what is in our spiritual bug out bag.

Whether the economy swings up or swings down, whether we go into another shutdown or we change tiers from purple to hot pink, you need to think more about what you have in your spiritual locker more than anything else. Because the time you take to pack your spiritual toolkit will make the difference the next time you and your family hit a bump in the road.

It’s nice to have an extra roll (or 10) of toilet paper (and most of us have made sure that we do), but even more critical is having something to offer to your teenager who is struggling with suicidal thoughts or your neighbor who just had their spouse walk out the door or your best friend who is so deep in debt that they don’t even know where to begin. The answer to all of these challenges is more spiritual than physical. And if we haven’t packed correctly, we won’t be of much value in times of crisis.

The Apostle Peter encouraged his audience to “always be prepared.” He wanted them, and he would want us today, to be ready for the questions, the needs, and the challenges that come our way. Being prepared doesn’t happen by accident; it requires time and attention.

I believe he would challenge each one of us to spend time making sure that our spiritual bags are packed so that we can be of use when the time comes.

How are your spiritual bags? Many of us are unprepared. We’re holding on by a thread. The good news is that you don’t have to stay that way!

Preparation begins with acknowledging that you need to make a change in your life. Perhaps you need to open yourself to the God of the universe and invite Him to speak to you. Perhaps you need to turn off the screens, the social media, and the noise and tune into a more heavenly channel? Packing your spiritual bags means taking care of spiritual business: saying yes to God more often than you say yes to the lower parts of your nature.

Like everything else, it all begins at the beginning. The pastors of Kings County are always available to help you pack the right things in your spiritual bags! If you need help getting started, check the series, “Preppers: Are You Ready?” at kchanford.com/preppers
 

Andrew Cromwell
Lead Pastor