There are moments in life when you feel like you are in the pits. I’m not sure what it takes for you to get there but, a lot of the time, it’s unsuspected things that make me feel down, disregarded, or just generally questioning all the things. Like, when a good friend or close family member moves away. Or when faced with something at work that I feel unqualified for or I simply don’t enjoy doing. When I get into a disagreement with my husband, realizing later that I was the reason that issue was so complicated to begin with, into the pit I go! But I tell you, nothing gets me feeling low like the fruit of unforgiveness.
There have been several expanses of time when it didn’t take much effort to hold a grudge. I’ve held onto offense for things that in my earthly mind, seemed worthy. I must admit I’ve held onto offense for things that, in hindsight, now that the heat is turned back down, I find pretty silly. I sometimes find myself mad because someone else is mad at me! They didn’t do anything, but the sheer presence of their emotion results in a feeling of distrust, or frustration, or the need to either fight or separate.
Today, I woke up and imagined Joseph, the one with the coat of many colors, down in the pit. He didn’t find himself in a pit of despair, frustration, or just regular blues. He found himself in a literal hole in the ground. He was dropped down into the earth and literally left to die by his brothers. His. Own. Brothers. What in the world?! I can’t imagine what would be going through his mind. He was probably terrified. He was probably rethinking sharing and trusting them with his dream. He was probably kicking himself for his lack of humility. He was probably super offended. Then, after who knows how long in the pit, the story found in Genesis 37 tells us that the brothers return! What a feeling of relief he must have felt! “Praise the Lord, I’ll get a second chance, and we can make all these issues go away.” But no. They didn’t come to rescue him or reconcile with him. They came to sell him into slavery. Now they were profiting off of his suffering. The ride in that caravan must have housed some complicated thoughts.
The rest of the story is moment after moment of being in the pit. From a moment appearing to be a reprieve, back into the pit. With God’s obvious hand guiding him along the way, he ends up saving the day for an entire generation, keeping more than an entire nation from starving during a drought. An incredible miracle of God’s goodness happens when he runs into his brothers again, asking for help. They don’t recognize him, they believe him to be long gone, probably dead. He has this moment when all of the moments preceding can manifest themselves in revenge or, at least, a simple rejection. That would make sense. That seems perfectly justified. They literally dropped him into a hole out of jealousy. He could at least deny their request for help. He could even toss them into prison and that would seem right according to my mind’s eye. But he doesn’t. He forgives. Not only does he forgive them, but he restores their relationship.
I want to do things Joseph style, which ultimately is Jesus’ style. When I am low, because of someone else, I want to allow the grace of God FOR me, to result in grace FROM me to them. So, who is your “them.” Who has frustrated or offended you lately and you still feel it? Who, metaphorically, put you into a pit with their different opinions, their broken behavior, or their response to you? Let’s live Joseph style and decide to love them anyway. Let’s decide to make sure they are good. Let’s make sure they have what they need. Let’s make sure they experience grace and love through us!
Candace Cortez
Executive Pastor
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